Meeting a beautiful woman can be bad for your health, scientists have found.

IT’S SCIENCE!(tm)

Oh yeah? Whose health? All people? Bad for other beautiful women? Bad for whom?

Oh, right. Bad for men. Who are the only ones who read the news, and therefore addressing all news readers as though they are men is totally appropriate. Also, these male readers must all be straight, since it doesn’t seem like much of a stretch to assume gay men may not have the same feelings about women as straight men.

But remember people, IT’S SCIENCE!

Is it the existence of an attractive woman that is bad for men’s health, or is it society’s and men’s unhealthy attitudes about women that trigger men’s supposedly negative health reactions?

Obviously, this is something that women are deliberately doing to men, to harm them. We women are deliberately attractive to men as a gigantic plot to destroy them. The University of Valencia in Spain, where this study was conducted, has finally outed our massive, world-encompassing secret! Women are nefarious by nature and can never be trusted.

Bonus info: Apparently in Germany, this news was an even bigger hit, and the headlines are even worse. For example:

Schöne Frauen sind schlecht fürs Herz (Beautiful Women Are Bad for Your Heart)

Nachrichten : Schaden Schöne Frauen Der Gesundheit? (Do Beautiful Women Harm Your Health?)

Schöne Frau, gestresster Mann (Beautiful Woman, Stressed Out Man)


Schöne Frauen stressen
(Beautiful Women Are Stressful)

Advertisement