Take Your Guns to Work Day

Every Day Is Take-Your-Guns-to-Work Day, at least in Florida

The Florida Senate just passed a very sensible measure, and it is awaiting the signature of Governor Charlie Crist. Pending approval, every worker in the state, with a few minor exceptions, can bring their guns to work every day. So long as they have a permit and leave them locked in their cars.

Though this seems to discriminate against gun-toting workers who do not own cars, a small oversight that I am sure Florida senators will hastily correct (perhaps they will mandate gun-lockers at all work places), this bill is the height of rational cost-benefit analysis.

It is imperative that if terrorists invade your Celebration, FL Pizza Hut, that you have the ability to leave, run out to your car, unlock it, grab your gun, run back in, and then kill all the terrorists.

Excited proponents of this law point out that it “upholds the vision of the authors of the U.S. Constitution” of every nanny, sales clerk and beautician armed to the teeth at work.

“The second thing they wrote about in that constitution was the right to bear arms,” said Sen. Durell Peaden, a Republican from Crestview, Florida. “It was what was dear in their hearts.”

This is, clearly, exactly the interpretation of the Second Amendment that our founding fathers had in mind.

Idiots, also known as libruls, point out:

The most common profile of a violent worker is a white male 25 to 50 years old, a loner with a history of violence and who has demonstrated a fascination with weapons.

or

Dozens of workplace shootings occur every year in the United States and studies have shown that job sites where guns are permitted are more likely to suffer workplace homicides than those where guns are prohibited.

Well, maybe they’d like it better if it was combined with one of their favorite work rituals, Take Your Daughter to Work Day: Have Your Daughter Take Your Guns to Work Day.

(c) idyllicmollusk 4/11/08

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